People watching and the fear of being judged

I've never been a real people person. I have a tendency to find myself a quiet corner and stay there. Especially in a new environment or in an environment full of strangers and even more so in an environment fill of strangers of the opposite sex. When I started my own business necessity became the mother of invention and I had to teach myself to network. And no people think that everyone knows me and I know everyone. That is about as far from the truth as can be.

I had to make a real effort in order to get myself to learn how to network in the business world and even more of an effort to be able to "sell". I'm still probably not very good at "selling" but I get by. There is always room for improvement. But I don't think I've yet made similar strides on the social side of things.

Tonight's blog is inspired by a night at Doc's. Now, Jim, the guy who owns Doc's he is a realy social networker. And an overall good guy. I find that I really like to frequent the places where I know the owners. It gives the place it's own charm and it's own awe. Like the new My Thai restaurant on Walnut and Aiken (above Anne Taylor is how most women would know what I'm talking about! ;-) ) and Mad Mex in Oakland. Anyhow, I digress.

I went to Docs after dinner @ My Thai (yes, again) to get a drink and watch people. I like doing that once in a while. To just be an "observer" and watch people. Watching people is fun as you don't know who they are, what they are like but you sit there and you watch their actions and their behavior and you can make up things of your own. Karen says that's how people write fiction. They observe people and from it grows a character. Now I definitely haven't developed an incling for writing fiction. I doubt I'd say I've developed an incling for writing yet... it's more rambling!

But I realize that I am again a hypocrit. Because in a way I am guilty of doing the very same thing that I fear people are doing to me: judging. Or is it not considered judging until you interact with the person? But either way I am forming a preconceived notion of the person(s) I'm observing. And it is this very fear of being a victim of preconceived notions which often makes me more likely to go hide in my own corner and not really engage any new person in conversation.

There is a lot more learning to be done...